I’ve gotten a number of hits from people googling, yahoo-ing, and msn-ing the word ‘ditz’ (and hosta plants). Usually, the keywords are something along the lines of what’s is ditz or what a ditz is or what is a ditz?, leading me to believe (judging by the wording, the bad grammar, and the fact that they have to search-engine ‘ditz’ when they could simply go to, like, dictionary.com) that most Americans (and probably a handful of kids from Burundi) don’t have the slightest clue what the term ‘ditz’ means.
Okay, that’s enough.
Unfortuately, dictionary.com offers two boring entries on ‘ditz’. Urban Dictionary (which is a website I try to avoid as much as possible, as its contributors are a bunch of idiots) isn’t being very helpful, either, having twelve definitions written in Moronese. And since there isn’t a Moronese-English option over at Babelfish: g’luck.
It’s getting more and more awkward here at work, ever since I was co-erced into being account muse for the upcoming PSOlympics. Also: doesn’t the whole muse-and-escort thing end in, like, grade school? I generally tend to keep to myself whenever I’m in the office, only talking to people from my department (corporate travel). Now, I have people talking about me RIGHTTOMYFACE at the smoking area and people from ATHOUSANDAISLES away pointing me out to other people. Christ. I’m feeling uglier and uglier by the minute and I’m crossing my fingers that…I don’t know, *they* change their minds? I seriously am not looking forward to prancing around a basketball court in a tacky skimpy outfit to be boo-ed, tittered, and hooted at by people. Or worse, be greeted by silence.
(Not me, please. I have the personality of a block of wood. And I’m fat.)
There are just some things I’d rather not deal with. Things like that kind of bullshit, my insecurities, and a chewed out inner right cheek caused by sucking on too much sugared jelly candies.
Hi, I'm Helga Weber and welcome to my personal site. I'm 25 and in the process of learning how to make adventurous life choices. I dislike old people but I love grandma clothes. My goal in life is to build a ball pit right next to my bed. Currently searching for the perfect house coat. My lover is the greatest. 
Sexy is the same everywhere I guess… but you can say “Heisser Junge” (hot boy) or “Heisser Mann” (hot man) ;) Or “du bist ein geiler kerl” (You’re a horny making guy). “Ich will deinen Schwanz in mir” (I want your dick inside me)… you know… just the usual stuff :P
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Ditz? It’s helgatheweber, who else?!
I get more hits with “boobs,” “tattoo,” and “boob tattoo” than with “misteryosa.” Bunch of pervs, I presume. And I’m not even perv-worthy.
Muse and escort thingie? GEESH. Sucks. But you go show them who helgatheweber is anyway!
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Wah! PSOlympics!!! Do you have Cheerdance there too? coz you should be there… haha! In my case, I’ve been “forced to volunteer” for the dance and it’s been ages since the last time I dance in front of a cheering crowd during halftimes. Disco Dance Floor is entirely different. Hehe. :D
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actually i found your site just like ditz
^ ok that just didnt make sense, but you know the story.. anyway.. i know i should blog more but i just dont feel like doing it.. aww
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What are you talking about? I love urbandictionary!
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You are not even a dozen pounds close to the normal societal notion of “fat!” Also, earth to hellbear, nothing will ever make you un-dateable. not even “fat.” How’s that for a moralle boost? Now strut down that PSOlympics venue and show them how the real Ms. Thing looks like! Go, Helga!
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Well i got more hits on vagina as well as boobs and of course queer and chef.
But it is so funny to see those search words they are using and got to through your blog due to it. There was one like ” fingering an unwashed vagina”
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gahh. but post pictures of the event, okie? :P
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I thought “Ditz”‘s your middle name.
Helga The Weber y Ditz.
?
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July 28th, 2007 at 6:15 am
That’s THE Helga Jossel “The” Weber y Ditz for you, mister. Or something.
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