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Chicks I’d Bang

Friday night at our neighborhood watering hole, I was able to witness a Miriam College Lesbian Chick Fight (of course, I could be wrong about them being from Miriam College, especially since I can’t argue “I know my kind” because a) I am not a lesbian, b) I refuse to associate myself with them and c) I wasn’t your typical MC chick. But yeah, I know a Miriam College lesbian when I see one). A drunken group of girls sitting on the sidewalk (a few meters away from the garbage pile), two of them bitching at each other while the rest sat around and not cared. The butch in the relationship starts cursing at the femme and the femme curses back. Femme stands up, butch pushes her back, and femme— in her tube dress glory— falls ungracefully on the concrete, her legs up in the air. The fight doesn’t end there, but we don’t stick around to watch for more. Too bad I forgot my SD card at home, or else I’d have sneakily snapped some pictures.

I recount the incident to some friends and throw in a couple more stories about how feral lesbian relationships’ fights can get. One of them says that perhaps it’s the lack of sex between girl-girl couples that make them so volatile and violent. I agree.

But really, for the following chicks ladies, I’d willingly give up…well, a few things (trying to keep it PG, trying to avoid the C-word).

KRISTEN BELL (Veronica Mars, Forgetting Sarah Marshall)

Kristen Bell

MILEY CYRUS (Hannah Montana)

Miley Cyrus

(Nevermind that I’ve never seen an episode of Hannah Montana, I adore Little Miss Skank City. At first, I couldn’t decide whether or not to like her camwhoring ass until I saw her guest and sing on Oprah and that’s when I decided: I like her camwhoring ass.

Also, I felt really really dirty looking at pictures of Miley.)

KIM KARDASHIAN (her sex tape with Ray J, Keeping Up With The Kardashians)

Kim Kardashian

(Again, nevermind that she’s shallow and #2 on the New York Times’ dumbest list and maybe her ass is two seconds away from being obese. Kim K is hot stuff.)

HAYDEN PANETTIERE (Bring It On: All Or Nothing, Heroes)

Hayden Panettiere

(She makes out with girls! Or used to, same difference.)

MILA KUNIS (That 70s Show)

Mila Kunis

LEIGHTON MEESTER (Gossip Girl)

Blair Waldorf

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24 Comments

  • Reply Holly June 17, 2008 at 4:41 pm

    Lol those people fighting sound funny, to be honest! :P

  • Reply Amanda June 17, 2008 at 5:49 pm

    They’re hot, except Kim and Miley just don’t work for me. One is like, skanky pedophilia and the other is… “curvy” to the extent of what boob-less people would be called “fat”.

  • Reply Tracy June 17, 2008 at 6:03 pm

    Ok, you didn’t mention me. No humping? :( But Mila Kunis – I’m with you on her.

  • Reply Ben June 17, 2008 at 6:34 pm

    This is a post I can identify with (the second part rather than the first part.. can’t say I’ve seen many fighting lesbians).

    Not sure about some of the choices, but then who are we kidding. I am a guy and would hardly turn any of them down now, would I.

  • Reply Hayden Panettiere Celebrity Gossip | CHICKS I’D BANG. June 17, 2008 at 7:43 pm

    […] HAYDEN PANETTIERE (Bring It On: All Or Nothing, Heroes) (She makes out with girls! Or used to, same difference…. Source: CHICKS I’D BANG. […]

  • Reply alohapenny June 17, 2008 at 9:45 pm

    Hayden’s body though is kind of like a man, hehe. Blairrrr!!!!

  • Reply philos June 17, 2008 at 10:20 pm

    I realize you’re looking at this from a lady’s POV, but I agree with you on Hannah Montana (saw her pics, oohh lala!) and Jackie!

    That said, I’ve always thought that chick fights (after being a witness to a few of ’em), not necessarily lesbo chick fights, were rather violent. Except for TV violence among men, we’re really… much more domesticated.

    Man 1: “Ano pare, laban ka?”
    Man 2: “Kaw lang eh”
    Man 1: “Ano ha? Laban ka?”
    Man 2: “Duwag ka naman eh!”

    (repeat 3x before they finally agree to meet at a vacant lot where nobody will show up)

  • Reply thegreatest June 17, 2008 at 10:44 pm

    Mila…rawr. =)

  • Reply thegreatest June 17, 2008 at 10:46 pm

    Wait, where’s Vanessa Hudgens??

  • Reply joyfulchicken June 17, 2008 at 10:47 pm

    Yes, no, no, yes, yes, yes.

  • Reply Stacy June 17, 2008 at 10:53 pm

    I’m an Eva Mendez, Mila Kunis girl myself. I think I have my type – brunettes – long-haired brunettes w/ wavy hair. Wow I’m so specific I think I may be a lesbian.

    I never understood though, why girls would go after butch girls. If you’re a lesbi, why not just get the whole package?

  • Reply Shen-Shen June 18, 2008 at 2:55 am

    Hahah, this is a good idea.. I think I’ll be needing to make list like this some time!

    I only agree with Kristen Bell and Hayden Panettiere, though :X

    Also.. Miley Cyrus and Kim Kardashian?! You’re a pedo skank lover?!

  • Reply Baddie June 18, 2008 at 9:46 am

    I’D BANG ALL OF THEM! Except Hayden. Meh.

  • Reply kenna June 18, 2008 at 10:28 am

    my first reaction after reading the first part of the past is.. “cool” .. hehe weird

  • Reply kenna June 18, 2008 at 10:29 am

    ooooh i looooove leighton… which she has more boobs though.. but yeah she’s on my list too :)

  • Reply J June 18, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    LMAO on Miley Cyrus. That is dirty, but she is a camwhore huh? Sort of like myself at her age, so I guess I dig her too. But not as jailbait. Maybe when she’s 18.

    Kim Kardashian makes me feel OK about being thicker than I’d like.

    EEW Gossip Girl=NO bad gross dumb show for middle schoolers to watch. (I’ve actually never seen an episode, but it looks stupid. What’s good about it?)

  • Reply Kim Kardashian Celebrity Gossip | Permanent link to CHICKS I’D BANG. June 18, 2008 at 2:14 pm

    […] CHICKS I’D BANG. June 17, 2008 at 4:19 pm | Filed under lists Friday night at our neighborhood watering hole, I was able to witness a Miriam College Lesbian Chick Fight (of course, I could be wrong about them being from Miriam College, especially since I can’t argue “I know my kind” because a) I am not a lesbian, b) I refuse to associate myself with them and c) I wasn’t your typical MC chick. But yeah, I know a Miriam College lesbian when I see one). A drunken group of girls sitting on the sid Source: Permanent link to CHICKS I’D BANG. […]

  • Reply sab June 18, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    kim k is hot! also megan fox. and eva mendes, jessica alba…

    uhh..

    thinks of usher, chris brown, kobe bryant & johnny depp

  • Reply Mara June 18, 2008 at 11:22 pm

    Yeah, where’s Leighton? Mine includes Cate Blanchett (if she was in her Bob Dylan outfit), Kim from cycle something of ANTM, and Kate Beckinsale. Also, Kristen Bell.

    Lolz that Kim K’s only works are “her sex tape with Ray J” and her reality show.

  • Reply tiff June 19, 2008 at 12:50 am

    But Mily Cyrus is a minor!

    And I’d def. bang Kunis in heartbeat. If I was a lesbian, I’d date her too. She’s plays more video games than she goes out. Amazing.

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  • Reply Melissa June 25, 2008 at 3:24 am

    I wake up underneath Hayden every weekend.

    Well, a poster of her that my boyfriend has above his bed. Not that I’m complaining, mind. ;)

  • Reply Kennaaaaaaaa! » Blog Archive » Yum yum *wink* July 25, 2010 at 3:27 pm

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