Archive for October, 2009
October 29, 2009 at 6:56 pm | Filed under joyful girl, the helga manual
Early this year, I was contacted by a local artist asking for permission to use one of my photos as reference for a painting he was working on for his next exhibit (whew, long, badly-written sentence right there). I can’t say that this sort of thing happens to me on a daily basis and I’m not one to be overly possessive of my face/photos (or in this case, my lips and left hand) so naturally, I said yes.
This was some months ago and I’ve sort of forgotten about it until the artist contacted me a couple of days ago. Apparently, that particular piece was first to sell at his last exhibit and “is now held by a famous art collector”.
Yeah, I’m a little giddy.
The artist’s name is Ronald Caringal and the exhibit was called “First Impression Lusts”. Lifted from his site:
The next show takes on how physical urges create such an impact on one’s character and sense of being. Man’s desire for physical intimacy and sex is sometimes watered down and delegated to mere craving. What is supposed to be a very intimate physical manifestation has become a meaningless act of self-satisfaction. The difference between man and animal is that even though we share the same urges, ours carry meaning. We can crave food but it is a need that has to be sufficed regardless of craving. What separates us is our ability to be humane.
I believe no one has died for not having participated in consummation.
I believe that any action taken without taking into account that it is done unto another human being, any action taken that is not rooted in respect and appreciation is dehumanizing.
The works show women alongside tempting food or presented in equivalence to as a blunt equation of what certain male perspectives amount to. Sex is a pre-packed commodity and market niche nowadays. We have come to use it so blatantly. It is offered so haphazardly. Sometimes men look at women in the same light as they would a delicious looking ice cream sundae. Watering mouth and all. Diminished brain activity. Some women share the same guilt. We may never escape our urges, for they are also much-appreciated privileges, but it is possible that these urges can be reasons to empower ourselves with satisfying deeper human needs.
The works are done in oil on canvas with assemblage.
He turned this:
Into this:
it was the moment she became too hot to blow
Shit’s awesome, I tell ya.
October 28, 2009 at 5:55 pm | Filed under camwhorage, outfits
Monday. I found this grandmother top/dress for fifty pesos at a thrift store (lol ok— ukay place) last Sunday.
I like looking like your grandmother’s floral couch. My mom observed that the pieces I picked out that day were pieces my Mama Francing (her mom) would most likely wear. I would seriously love to go through her old clothes.
Tuesday. I should’ve taken a closer shot of my cropped cardigan so you could see the cutie bird and flower patches on it. This one was even cheaper than my grandmother top/dress, heh. It’s in good condition, too!
Wednesday. Penny got me this Tinkerbell-y polka dot skirt! Well, Riz made her get it for me when they were at a street bazaar at Cubao X a couple of weekends ago (check out Riz’s online boutique, The Dreamerie). I have such darling friends! Naturally, I’m wearing it as a top/dress (I don’t really do long skirts anymore).
I’m expecting two new pairs of leggings (a pair of ripped and a pair of zippered liquid, I think) mid-November which is too far away but I. Must. Not. Spend. Anymore., as I’m looking forward to a possible something this December (so I have to save up!).
October 27, 2009 at 1:28 pm | Filed under the internets
How to vote:
1) Go to the Official Noynoy Facebook Fan Page at http://www.facebook.com/noynoy.aquino
2) Slide down to the Photos section located at the left panel and click on the Avatar Voting photo album (or go straight here).
3) Browse through all the avatars consisting of 122 entries in 7 pages.
4) Click on the avatar you wish to vote on.
5) Click on the “Like” link below the avatar to register your vote.
Notes:
- You can vote on as many avatars as you wish.
- Deadline of voting on Facebook will be on November 6, 2009.
- Only the Top 10 avatars with the most number of votes (“Like”) will be included in the shortlist for the final voting.
- Noynoy will select his own Top 10 avatars that will be included in the final voting.
- Final voting will be done from November 7 to 14, 2009 at the Noy official website at http://noynoy.ph.
- Announcement of the winning entry will be posted on the Official Facebook and Website on November 15, 2009.
A few of my favorites:
#23:
#28:
#110 (because the mouth looks like the 4chan LOLHAY smiley):
Vote and spread the word!
October 26, 2009 at 6:55 pm | Filed under lists, the helga manual
Once upon a time, I dated all the wrong kinds of men. The tired “I was young, naive, incredibly self-important, and a ridiculous contradiction” excuse applies to my taste in men and my approach to relationships (mostly pseudo-relationships) when I was in my teens up until I was 22. Back then, I thought I had standards until years later, while reviewing and poking fun at each other’s respective pasts, the boyfriend pointed out my (very) questionable taste in men. I couldn’t help but agree considering that the dudes I went out with back then are the kind of dudes I wouldn’t so much as look at or exchange a single word with today.
It makes me cringe, but being young, I think I was excusable. I had no idea what I really wanted back then and I settled for whatever boylet whose attention I fancied. Ick. Gratefully, I’m done with dating and though this is late and irrelevant, here is a list of some relationship dealbreakers— standards I wish I had back then.
1) You have a beer belly.
This is probably hypocritical of me since I, myself, have a widdle fratman gut but I’m a girl and a little belly (not exceeding four inches the girth of one’s waist) can be cute. If you’re a dude (especially a skinny one), though, it kinda makes you look like a malnourished African kid. Not sexy.
(Food bellies, I don’t mind. Unlike beer bellies, food bellies don’t stick out like a balloon hiding in your midsection.)
2) You don’t know your way around the internet.
You have one email address and not a single social network account. Not only does that make you non-stalkable (I need to know if your interests are good enough to hold my fascination and if you’re all-angles cute), it also means you won’t understand my need to tweet, plurk, and blog several aspects of my life (which may or may not include you). You’ll also probably freak out when you see all my self-portraits on my Flickr account which you’ll most likely find a little too liberated for your tastes.
3) You use the term “sexually-liberated”.
And use it in conversations with your buddies that you’d expect from a bunch of highschoolers.
4) You’re someone I already dated.
I don’t recycle men. An ex is an ex is an ex, bye.
5) You say “po”.
For the non-Filipinos, “po” is a word used to show respect when talking to elders and/or to someone you respect. Because I wasn’t raised in a traditional Filipino household, it’s not a word I use a lot and is a word I don’t use at all when conversing with my folks. Why you would use it when talking to someone you’re dating is beyond me.
6) You won’t drive me to work.
What do you mean you’re just going to drive me to the main avenue and wait with me while I get a cab because you have somewhere else to be/it’s late/you just don’t feel like making the drive to my office? We’re already in the car, there’s gas, and it’s a fifteen-minute drive away.
7) You wear ill-fitting shirts/shirts that reach your knees.
That’s called a dress.
8) Saliva forms in the corners of your mouth when you talk.
Just…no. Maybe you’re incredibly cute or intelligent and maybe there’s a cure for that but I’m already so turned off that I don’t care enough to Google it for you.
What are your dealbreakers?
October 23, 2009 at 6:55 pm | Filed under LAWLZ you idiot, the internets
I just got this SMS:
Hello! Greetings!!!:-)
My name is [redacted], Marketing Officer for [redacted] ([redacted]).
I would just like to take this bold opportunity to announce this WONDERFUL NEWS about a RARE PROMO OFFER for a FULLY-FUNCTIONAL website development service that we would like to provide you for your competitive business need to GAIN A STRONG POSITION in the industry, as well as to REALIZE/MATERIALIZE today’s untapped potential markets. For ONLY PhP 30,000, our Web Development Team shall ensure your PROMINENCE and UNMATCHED OUTPUT CALIBER, which features WEBMAIL functions, ONLINE BOOKING, WEB SECURITY features, and a DYNAMIC MEDIA GALLERY for your photos/videos. Also, we’ve already thrown in the offer a robust CONTENT MANAGEMENT SYSTEM (CMS) and POST-PHASE REVISIONARY WORK, which deals with the completed website’s services for TROUBLESHOOTING, MONITORING, and MINOR UPDATES/BASIC REVISIONS that are available for one (1) month, FREE!!!
This offer has been sent to all enterprises close to our network, and is available for a VERY LIMITED TIME ONLY!
If you’re interested in availing this rare offer, please call/text [redacted] at [redacted] or their landline: [redacted].
Lastly, should you wish to first view the caliber of our past works, you are very much welcome to visit our official [redacted] website: [redacted].
E-mail inquiries are also entertained. Kindly send them to: [redacted].
Thank you and have a blessed day!:-)
I kid you not. ALL THAT (bullshit) via text message. Reading about a Logo usb drive is even more exciting that reading that drivel.
Now this guy (aka Mr Marketing Officer) has sent me a handful of long-winded bullshit messages in the past, the kind that makes you want to punch someone in the face out of annoyance. You would think that my lack of replies to said messages (even after he texted something about him still being hopeful because I didn’t say no to his invitation for me to hang out at his condo’s pool side and talk about this business idea of his— which, by the way, sounded all very boring and Team Manila-ish— even though I actually did say no when I told him I was uncomfortable with the idea of hanging out with someone I barely know) would send a signal NEVER TO TEXT ME AGAIN. Dense is dense, I guess.
Dear Company X,
Fire your marketing officer.
XOXO, Helga
Hi, my name's Helga Weber and welcome to my personal site. I'm 24. My first socio-political scandal will happen at the age of 35 and will include men, sushi, an African country, and lots of money. My lover is the greatest. 
