And they’d all chant “Welga! Welga! Welga!” at me. Because it rhymes with my name (obviously). The things kids do, I swear.

I need two more blog entries this day for reasons I will not say but y’all probably know. Oh, I got hipster glasses:

I got them for fifty pesos in Cubao. That’s a dollar something for you non-Filipinos.

On to the self-serving stuff (everyone’s done this so I’m not the only boring one, ok):

If I were a month, I’d be May.
If I were a day of the week, I’d be Friday.
If I were a time of day, I’d be happy hour.
If I were a planet, I’d be Mars.
If I were a sea animal, I’d be a nudibranch!
If I were a direction, I’d be nowhere.
If I were a piece of furniture, I’d be a couch.
If I were a liquid, I’d be beer. Mixed with female fat burners.
If I were a gemstone, I’d be emerald.
If I were a tree, I’d be an umbrella tree!
If I were a tool, I’d be a Photoshop pen tool.
If I were a flower, I’d be a cherry blossom.
If I were a kind of weather, I’d be a cold day.
If I were a musical instrument, I’d be a synthesizer.
If I were a color, I’d be Barbie pink.
If I were an emotion, I’d be fascinated.
If I were a fruit, I’d be a cherry.
If I were an element, I’d be water.
If I were a car, I’d be a …vintage something. I know nothing about cars except they have four wheels, they get you wherever you want to be, and that you need a license to use it. And that you shouldn’t drink while/if you’re going to be behind the wheel.
If I were a food, I’d be a bucket of fried chicken.
If I were a place, I’d be the city.
If I were a material, I’d be recycled paper LOLIDK.
If I were a scent, I’d be green tea.
If I were an animal, I’d be a Siamese or a ragdoll kitty.
If I were a facial expression, I’d be a scrunched nose.
If I were a song, I’d be Lykke Li’s Little Bit.
If I were a pair of shoes, I’d be wedges.