behind the scenes

In This Entry, I Am Shallow and Maybe A Bit Nasty

When I was in the fifth grade, I got punched in the face by a female classmate.

It was after school and we were running around and playing on the school grounds, waiting for our rides home or waiting for ourselves to tire from all the fun and games before heading home.

There is this stupid thing that little girls do: you grab the skirt’s hem of a fellow female friend or classmate and lift it, exposing her underwear or shorts. Lots of girls did it to me, I did it to a lot of girls. It’s embarrassing, annoying, and not even remotely funny (like most Filipino comedy shows and Willie Revillame) but we do it anyway. I think it’s a Filipino thing (is it?): finding glee in other people’s misfortune, finding amusement in other people’s embarrassment.

That particular afternoon, someone lifted my skirt. No big deal, I’ll just do it to someone else (don’t ask me to explain the logic of a fifth-grader). I ran over to her, lifted her skirt, and ran away (that’s how the game goes). She marched over to where I was and then punched me. In the face.

I was shocked and didn’t know how to react. It didn’t help that she was one of the popular kids while I was this ugly, dark-skinned girl with goggle marks around her eyes who didn’t have a lot of friends (or wasn’t friends with the right people). So she punched me and I didn’t punch back and that was that.

Fastforward to a little over a decade: we’re Facebook friends. Her photos show up in my live feed. Girlfriend is ugly. UGG-LEEE, I tell ya (the motorhome towing sort of ugly. WUT). The kind of ugly that makes me think: was she this ugly all along, all this time, all her life and I just didn’t notice it ’til I stopped being ugly?

I know I sound totally shallow and self-absorbed but plz, I got punched in the face. It’s okay, though, cos life punched her back with the ugly fist.

It amuses me.

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like


  • Reply Justine April 14, 2010 at 5:49 pm


  • Reply tin April 14, 2010 at 5:56 pm

    YO MA!

  • Reply clementine April 14, 2010 at 6:00 pm

    We all grow up, H.

    Perhaps Girlfriend was hella-ugly before but since you were thinking with the mind of a fifth-grader, she was the shizz at the time. Unfortunately, she ended up lookin’ like shizz like what you said.

    My seatmate in fifth grade dared me to use my rusty old stapler on his hand. When I did, he told on me. Eight years later we started dating. What a mistake that was.

    Oh well. Fifth grader logic

  • Reply Carina April 14, 2010 at 6:26 pm

    For srs. Pics or it didn’t happen.

    (The ugly girl. I’m not questioning the face punching. Also, sorry about what happened to your past self.)

  • Reply Alyssa April 14, 2010 at 6:46 pm

    Apparently, it’s a German thing, too. They call it schadenfreude, delighting in another person’s misfortune.

  • Reply Holly April 14, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    Hahaha that’s kind of awesome! :D

  • Reply Katy April 15, 2010 at 3:26 am

    Ahahahaha this story is hilarious. Can you say karma?

  • Reply Janine April 15, 2010 at 4:43 am

    I LOVE THIS. Truths.

  • Reply Aldo April 15, 2010 at 7:13 pm

    Haha, you mean!

    Thanks too, this inspires a blog entry.

  • Reply Duder April 18, 2010 at 10:10 am

    Not necessarily a Filipino thing. It’s pretty normal. Late night talk shows would often make fun of other people’s misfortune.

  • Leave a Reply