behind the scenes

Hello, May, My Birth Month

I turn a year older in less than three weeks and because I am not at peace with my position/situation in life, I am legitimately dreading it. I was having a very non-comforting conversation with my boyfriend about this today; I wailed to him (as much as one can wail over the internet)— what am I going to do with my over-the-hill self? He replied with “you’re gonna look back and be embarrassed at your younger self.”

But why can’t I have this wisdom, knowledge, etc and still be, I don’t know, 23?

(It’s okay, Helga, you don’t act your age anyway. Whether that’s a good thing or not is up for discussion. I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with things like adult acne.)

Anyway, instead of getting all sad and nancy (okay, that was terrible) on the internet/this blog/this life, I’ll just put together a list of what I’m currently doing or am into this month. This would probably be an appropriate Things I Love Thursday (TILT) entry but I am TERRIBLE at keeping up with that. Mondays and Tuesdays, I usually put together a list of things that make my little kitten heart go BABUMP BABUMP and then totally forget to write the entry and only remember it when it’s already Friday.

I need to work on that.

Back to this list— I’ll even give it a pretentious name, like… “du mois.” Yes, I totally checked Google Translate for that.

Swingset Chain, Loquat

Sort of appropriate for how I’ve been feeling about getting older (nevermind that it’s about something else). These lines hit the bullseye: “I’m freaking out that we’re running out of time / But to do what? / Should I stop and think of that? / Is there something I could do to slow it down?”

Drake, Nicki Minaj, Childish Gambino, and Britney Godney Spears.

Currently into Game of Thrones while I wait (a very long wait— January 2012!) for the second season of Being Human US. I am liking GoT so far but I need to pick up the books.

I started reading Cassandra Clare’s The Mortal Instruments series last Sunday. I’m not sure if I like it. I think Clary and Jace are stupid names.

Headbands! My hair is a mess right now: roots are showing and the color, dull. Until I have figured out what I want to do with it, I’m donning headbands because plain old ponytails are boring.

Making twitchy gifs of myself. I’ve been on Tumblr for far too long.

Other things I am currently into: lavender (the color), bacon, tofu (been on major tofu kick since April), dubstep, and young adult novels.

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  • Reply Carina May 4, 2011 at 6:29 pm


    I am also very much in a wail-y place in my life, but I am only turning 23 this year. I’d like to think that I am on my way to being the kind of person I’d like to be at 30, but I think I am just to lazy at the moment to do so, and I don’t know how to get rid of this laziness.

  • Reply Carina May 4, 2011 at 6:30 pm

    Also, IDK, where did you want to be?

    • Reply Helga May 4, 2011 at 6:33 pm

      OMG you’re a baby! I wanna be 23 again. Or 24. Forever.

      “Also, IDK, where did you want to be?”
      Car, house, oven, bike, sewing machine, vegetable garden. lolcry =(

      • Reply Carina May 4, 2011 at 7:31 pm

        I want all of that, too! I think the Internet somewhat ruined us. Super sidetracked and shit.

  • Reply Cheriel May 4, 2011 at 6:36 pm

    haha! your gif’s are so cute!

  • Reply Micamyx May 4, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    I’m turning 24 this Friday and feeling stagnant LOL. I love your hair hehe i think i saw you at the Mrt station last week… not sure if it’s you but with the hair color i guess it’s you hehe :P

  • Reply John Steven May 4, 2011 at 8:43 pm

    Yes you must read the A Song Of Ice And Fire books!

  • Reply Jean May 4, 2011 at 10:20 pm

    I kinda feel the same. Must be the age or something. Anyway, those gifs are too cute!

  • Reply Junjun McJunjun May 5, 2011 at 12:59 am

    Happy Birthday!


  • Reply Ochi May 5, 2011 at 4:57 am

    You’re so cute in your 2nd gif!

  • Reply sara] May 5, 2011 at 9:03 am

    For my 28th birthday post (w/c was last month), i made a 30 before 30 list…talk about semi-planning my life for the next 2 years, but it was liberating to actually list them down.

    Aaaaannnddd….im jealous of your gifs, lol.

    Cheers birthday girl :)

  • Reply Kenna May 5, 2011 at 11:33 pm

    Hey happy birthday, no wish list?

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