shit my boyfriend says

Shit My Boyfriend Says // 4

Shit My Boyfriend Says |

It’s been ages since the last SMBS. Joey still says funny things but most of them are inside jokes that no one would understand or appreciate, or are best experienced (like that time he sang along to Mr Big’s To Be With You in the car but changed all the words to “hold on little girl”). I don’t want to pressure him into saying things just so I’d have something to put on this blog but— goddamnit, Joey, SAY FUNNY THINGS FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION, PLEASE.

Again, some of these are old.

After making a pretty bomb-ass sandwich:

Joey: I’ll make that sandwich (salami, prosciutto, parmesan on ciabatta) again tomorrow.
Me: Yeah, it’s good! Better if you can add lettuce!
Joey: …choosy.
Me: I’m not! I still ate it!
Joey: Bigyan kitang *pandesal at ampalaya dyan.
Me: That’s like the worst sandwich.
Joey: You’ve never had one before? It’s good.
Me: As a form of punishment?
Joey: **Eh gusto mo ng greens eh.

*plain bread and bitter melon
**Well, you said you wanted greens.

Me, cooing about my dark blue hair:

Me: Guess who I am? I’m Sailor Mercury.
Joey: I thought you were going to say Shampoo.
Me: ?
Joey: Ranma?
Me: Oh I don’t watch anime I’m too sm–
Joey: Sailor Moon is anime.
Me: Oh.
Joey: *Kasi dada ng dada, di nag-iisip.

*You keep talking without thinking.

On him taking out Facebook ads:

Joey: I want to boost post.
Me: Okay, use my card and then just pay me.
Joey: I have to pay them 300USD first, is that okay?
Me: Yup, as long as you pay me back!
Joey: Okay. In Kisses Dollar? 1 Kisses Dollar = 150USD. High value!
Me: I only get two kisses?!
Joey: Three kisses. Then you have to pay me 150USD.

While poking my pillow:

Joey: Identify soft thing— Helga’s tummy or pillow?

While stuck in traffic:

Joey: How come your cats don’t smile?

After telling him animals don’t really smile:

Me: Dolphins look like they’re smiling but they really aren’t.
Joey: Dolphins smile. How can you say they don’t? Are you a dolphin?
Me: Are you?
Joey: Mas marunong ka pa sa dolphin.

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  • Reply sarah tirona March 10, 2015 at 9:50 am

    hahahaha, mas marunong ka pa kse sa dolphin!

  • Reply Clarisse March 10, 2015 at 10:11 am

    Too cute! ?

  • Reply Krista March 10, 2015 at 10:13 am

    “Mas marunong ka pa sa dolphin” I LOL’d like crazy omg

  • Reply Yza Marzan March 10, 2015 at 11:53 am

    Favorite line: “Mas marunong ka pa sa dolphin.” :D

  • Reply Corinth March 10, 2015 at 12:32 pm

    “How come your cats don’t smile?”

    Haha. Para maiba lang ako. :p

  • Reply Jaya March 10, 2015 at 1:03 pm

    “How come your cats don’t smile” HAHAHA I would have been like “Uhm how high are you??” Lol!

  • Reply Gelleesh March 10, 2015 at 1:37 pm

    I miss this series in your blog, Helga! This reminds me of conversations with my boyfriend as well. And I always say, “the effect of having a nerdy and a geeky boyfriend in one.” My boyfriend is kind of like a mix of Leonard and Sheldon (The Big Bang Theory). xD

  • Reply Paula March 10, 2015 at 1:53 pm

    Hi, i’m in love with your blog! i especially love this one “How come your cats don’t smile?” Haha!

  • Reply Yai March 10, 2015 at 2:16 pm

    In my head, I was reading Joey’s lines in Joey’s voice. Because that’s how this blog is supposed to be read. Bammy-wham.

  • Reply Cherry March 10, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    cats do smile! check out shironeko. haha you guys are funny

  • Reply Chester March 10, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Haha your boyfriend is the goal.

  • Reply Cae March 10, 2015 at 5:13 pm

    How come your cats don’t smile? Hahaha. This is prolly one of my favs :))

  • Reply Grace March 10, 2015 at 6:10 pm

    Mas marunong ka pa kase sa Dolphins eh!

  • Reply Janine March 10, 2015 at 6:15 pm

    Funny conversations! Iba talaga pag super comfortable na kayo with each other! “Mas marunong ka pa sa dolphin!” Hahahaha

  • Reply Brigitte March 10, 2015 at 7:02 pm

    hahaha ang cute nyo! Next time nga naman kasi wag ka mas marunong sa dolphin ????

  • Reply Roxanne March 10, 2015 at 10:13 pm

    You guys are so cute! I’m so glad that you’re happy again. I’ve been a fan of yours for a very long time and I’ve read a lot about your former relationships. I hope I’d be able to find someone someday who would also make me happy like how your boyfriend makes you happy. I usually exert a lot of effort in my relationships but I think I’m unlucky when it comes to guys I fall in love with because I’m usually the one who exerts more effort then gets dumped. :))

    I hope you’ll be able to post some tips on how to get over a breakup too because it’s been a long time since I became single so I kinda don’t know how to deal with this. :)) No pressure though. Just hoping! :) I also hope you guys would last for a lifetime because you look so cute and happy with each other. xx

  • Reply Trish March 10, 2015 at 11:26 pm

    LOL at the anime and dolphin conversations!

  • Reply Jhanz March 11, 2015 at 11:14 am

    Huhu you guys are the cutest!!!!

  • Reply Raisa March 11, 2015 at 2:19 pm

    My OTP 5ever. <3

  • Reply Christine March 12, 2015 at 12:04 am

    Hilarious couple!

  • Reply Chai March 12, 2015 at 4:15 am

    Haha! Well oo nga naman, Sailor Moon is anime.

    My boyfriend says that all the time din! “Bakit, dati ka bang ___ ? Bat mo alam?” Huhu. Ewan ko ba :))

  • Reply Aneth March 12, 2015 at 7:04 pm

    My favorite is #2 hahahahaha I really, really ship you, guys!!

  • Reply Alissa March 13, 2015 at 1:05 pm

    Haha! now this is funny. I’m backreading on your blog! Please don’t think I’m creepy. LOL.

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