Archive for lists
November 17, 2009 at 4:35 pm | Filed under lists, the helga manual
Katy posted a short list of her pet peeves over at her blog and I thought I’d follow suit (you’ll see me doing this a lot from now on, taking my cue from fellow bloggers re: topics) and post a list of my own. Like Katy, I’ve mellowed down a lot and am no longer the angry, short-tempered person I used to be. That doesn’t mean I don’t get pissed off by things, though!
People who do nothing but bitchbitchbitchbitch! online. Slap me with a pan if I become someone like this. I’m not saying that I don’t rant on my social network profiles or internet accounts because I do, but not constantly. I’m also aware that a lot of people use the internet to air out their offline frustrations but if that’s what you’re using the internet solely for, it gets really old.
When people impose their narrow-minded ideals and values on you. They’re just as bad as homophobes or bible-thumping Christians. Sometimes, they don’t even know it.
People who block the way. Maybe they don’t realize it or maybe they’re just too stupid to be aware that they’re inconveniencing other people so here’s a tip: if it’s an area that gets a lot of foot traffic, move to the side and out of the way if you feel the sudden urge to stop walking. Don’t just come to a halt and decide to text right there because I will intentionally come crashing onto the arm you’re holding your cellphone with.
Trying to be characters from Gossip Girl. It’s just ridiculous, especially in middle-class Philippines.
Ellipses used improperly. I don’t get it… why type your sentences like this… What are you omitting… I once asked someone why he typed like this… He said it was sweet… I… don’t… get… it…
Crazy Philippine weather. It’s November– the weather is supposed to be nippy, yet it feels like summer. The heat doesn’t make it feel like Christmas is less than a month away =(
“Shiznit”, “Biyatch/Biatch”, “Effing/Effin/F*cking” Two issues. First: I’m all for trimming the fat when it comes to words; with the exception of the last, why bother with “shiznit” and “biyatch/biatch” when you can just say “shit” or “bitch”? They’re a syllable and a few letters shorter. Easier to type and say. Second: oh, so you’re not comfortable saying “bad words”? Sorry to break it to ya, but cutesifying a curse word doesn’t make it any less a curse word. Also, how old are you? Two?
What are your pet peeves?
October 26, 2009 at 6:55 pm | Filed under lists, the helga manual
Once upon a time, I dated all the wrong kinds of men. The tired “I was young, naive, incredibly self-important, and a ridiculous contradiction” excuse applies to my taste in men and my approach to relationships (mostly pseudo-relationships) when I was in my teens up until I was 22. Back then, I thought I had standards until years later, while reviewing and poking fun at each other’s respective pasts, the boyfriend pointed out my (very) questionable taste in men. I couldn’t help but agree considering that the dudes I went out with back then are the kind of dudes I wouldn’t so much as look at or exchange a single word with today.
It makes me cringe, but being young, I think I was excusable. I had no idea what I really wanted back then and I settled for whatever boylet whose attention I fancied. Ick. Gratefully, I’m done with dating and though this is late and irrelevant, here is a list of some relationship dealbreakers— standards I wish I had back then.
1) You have a beer belly.
This is probably hypocritical of me since I, myself, have a widdle fratman gut but I’m a girl and a little belly (not exceeding four inches the girth of one’s waist) can be cute. If you’re a dude (especially a skinny one), though, it kinda makes you look like a malnourished African kid. Not sexy.
(Food bellies, I don’t mind. Unlike beer bellies, food bellies don’t stick out like a balloon hiding in your midsection.)
2) You don’t know your way around the internet.
You have one email address and not a single social network account. Not only does that make you non-stalkable (I need to know if your interests are good enough to hold my fascination and if you’re all-angles cute), it also means you won’t understand my need to tweet, plurk, and blog several aspects of my life (which may or may not include you). You’ll also probably freak out when you see all my self-portraits on my Flickr account which you’ll most likely find a little too liberated for your tastes.
3) You use the term “sexually-liberated”.
And use it in conversations with your buddies that you’d expect from a bunch of highschoolers.
4) You’re someone I already dated.
I don’t recycle men. An ex is an ex is an ex, bye.
5) You say “po”.
For the non-Filipinos, “po” is a word used to show respect when talking to elders and/or to someone you respect. Because I wasn’t raised in a traditional Filipino household, it’s not a word I use a lot and is a word I don’t use at all when conversing with my folks. Why you would use it when talking to someone you’re dating is beyond me.
6) You won’t drive me to work.
What do you mean you’re just going to drive me to the main avenue and wait with me while I get a cab because you have somewhere else to be/it’s late/you just don’t feel like making the drive to my office? We’re already in the car, there’s gas, and it’s a fifteen-minute drive away.
7) You wear ill-fitting shirts/shirts that reach your knees.
That’s called a dress.
8) Saliva forms in the corners of your mouth when you talk.
Just…no. Maybe you’re incredibly cute or intelligent and maybe there’s a cure for that but I’m already so turned off that I don’t care enough to Google it for you.
What are your dealbreakers?
October 22, 2009 at 4:49 pm | Filed under lists, things I love
It’s been a while since I last made a list of things I love (nearly a year, after checking my archives) which could mean a) I don’t love enough things or b) the truth: I’ve been a lazy blogger.
Lists don’t require much effort, though.
1. Men’s shirts, especially white ones
I recently acquired (and by that, I mean downloaded) a copy of Nina Garcia’s The One Hundred and sure enough “Man’s White Shirt” is listed as one of the pieces every stylish woman must own. “Aha”, I thought. “I have two (plus a few in other colors).”
I love how they go with practically everything in my closet (jeans, leggings, shorts, skirts, cutoffs… I believe my dresses are the only pieces I haven’t paired with a man’s shirt). The look— as Garcia describes it— sizzles; it’s slightly sexy, comfortable, and classic.
2. Leggings
“What would I do without leggings?” I constantly ask myself. Probably wear jeans, but on weekdays when it’s sweltering (which is just about everyday, in this tropical country of mine) or even on days when I just don’t want the feel of denim against my skin, boy am I ever thankful for The Versatile Pair of Black Leggings (and legs that look good in them, I guess).
3. Thursdays!
I’m following a handful of TV shows this season (which makes me feel a bit guilty because it takes up so much of my time but what can I do, I’m already hooked on the dramz): 90210, Melrose Place, Glee, Gossip Girl, The Vampire Diaries, and FlashFoward. Thursday night (after coming home from work) is when I download all six shows. Wanna guess which show I can’t wait ’til the weekend to watch? Clue: stars with a G and ends with Lee.
4. Cafe World
Zynga’s Cafe World is yet another Facebook app I am hooked on. It’s similar to Playfish’s Restaurant City (which I played for a bit before getting tired of it) but better because 1) you “cook” the dishes you want to serve and unlock more dishes as you level up, 2) you don’t need to feed your staff, and 3) you don’t need to keep the app/game running to gain points (though in CW, you only gain points with every dish cooked).
It’s really addicting =/
5. Reading about San Jose motorcycle accident attorney. That stuff is interesting, I tell ya!
Another list next Thursday, I hope.
October 12, 2009 at 6:01 pm | Filed under lists
Leopard Print Tulip Dress by Bysi, currently on sale (!!!). I saw this on display on my way to work this morning and although I normally stay away from whatever’s on the mannequins, I am making an exception for this dress. It’s so matrona-ish and the right kind of flashy (like an outdoor fireplace. No, wait), I have to have it. Plus, I need some animal print in my closet!
Cadbury’s Caramel Eggs. I randomly saw a photo on my Tumblr dashboard and now I’m a bit obsessed. Chocolate + caramel = party in my tummy. Does anybody know where I can get them locally? I’ve been told Duty Free doesn’t have them.
This kitty swimsuit. I need it in my life. I need to know who and where and why it still isn’t in my possession.
June 17, 2009 at 12:24 am | Filed under lists
Hello, hello! My laptop decided to re-install Windows by itself (and certainly without my permission, that insolent piece of metal and plastic and techie sorcery. I’m looking into secure online storage options) two Sundays ago, wiping out twenty gigs of music I had collected over the past three years. I’m coping.
Songs 21-40 (because ten aren’t enough!) will be songs that defined my high school years! It’s always good to remember the late 90s and early 00s, when mainstream pop was actually good*.
Although a couple of those listed are actually from the mid-90s, I think.
21. I Don’t Want To Wait – Paula Cole
There’s something magical in Paula Cole’s voice and this song always envelopes me in warm sunshine; there is an itch to run barefoot on sand while being bathed in golden light, the wind in my hair.
I blame Dawson’s Creek.
22. #1 Crush – Garbage
Such frightening passion (bordering on creepy/stalkerish) that aptly describes the love between Romeo and Juliet (at least the 20th century Hollywood blockbuster version…and you bet I was a huge fan of the movie and soundtrack). Now imagine a 12-year old girl wailing the words (my favorite lines: I will burn for you, feel pain for you, I will twist the knife and bleed my aching heart and tear it apart. I will lie for you, beg and steal for you, I will crawl on hands and knees until you see— you’re just like me) to this song. Scariest declaration of love. I love it.
23. The Rockafeller Skank – Fatboy Slim
One of my former high school best friends and I used to dance to this in their house’s guest bedroom after school. This and Korn’s Got The Life. Basically, we did a lot of jumping around in our uniforms.
24. Maria – Blondie
Maria is the kind of girl I would like to be: walking on imported air, making your heart beat like a subway train, blue as ice and desire, and all that.
25. Near You Always – Jewel
I didn’t think that the song I used to skip in favor of the heartbreaking You Were Meant For Me, the commentary on American lifestyle that is Who Will Save Your Soul, and the poetic Foolish Games would be the song that would play in my mind when I was falling in love with the lover. <3
26. Landslide (Fleetwood Mac original) – Smashing Pumpkins cover or Tori Amos cover
Everyone loved this song— to the point of cheesiness— in high school and I’m a bit annoyed at myself for not appreciating the original version more, but it is what it is: I spent my awkward teens listening (with the occasional sob here and there) to Billy Corgan’s barely breathless screeching earnestly singing about the passage of time, change, and loss. Nevermind that I was too young to know what it’s like to build my life around something and someone.
In college, I come across Tori Amos’s cover and fall in love all over again.
27. Nothing Compares 2 U – Sinead O’Connor
Remixed, this makes a good jeepney rock anthem. Sad and pining, it makes a perfect companion.
(I am aware that this song— the original, that is— is older than I am, heh.)
28. Celebrity Skin
I totally have a thing for sexy decadence and angry girl anthems. And cokewhores. Plus, Courtney Love and Melissa Auf der Maur!
29. Shimmer – Fuel
Because all that shimmers in this world is sure to fade away. Again.
30. Life in Mono – Mono
Best listened to at the beginning of your day, preferably when it’s gray and dreary. Or while drowning past regrets in tea and cigarettes.
*With some exceptions, of course. Boyzone, Ronan Keating, Westlife, and A1, to name a few.
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Hi, my name's Helga Weber and welcome to my personal site. I'm 24. My first socio-political scandal will happen at the age of 35 and will include men, sushi, an African country, and lots of money. My lover is the greatest. 
